Most cats have some very important jobs to do: clean frequently, nap even more frequently, and be purring balls of love and fur for those strange humans. Some cats, though, have even more important jobs. We’re not talking about bodega cats, either - think even bigger.
While you’re out on your own job, your cat might be looking at the classifieds for a gig, especially if he’s heard about any of these working kitties:
A cat’s purr has the power to heal - literally. Science has shown that cats purr at a frequency that actually encourages bones and bodies to heal faster. Whether you have physical pains or emotional ones, though, cats can help. Therapy cats offer aid to those in need, often visiting hospitals and nursing homes to do some much needed healing of the heart.
Some therapy cats have full time gigs as companions to people with a wide range of different needs, including stroke patients, autistic children, and people suffering from depression or high blood pressure. So no, you weren’t just imagining it - your cat’s very presence is scientifically proven to make people generally feel better. That is, unless you’re dealing with the next entry on our list:
Predicter of Death
Oscar the therapy cat lives in a nursing home in Rhode Island, and he’s no ordinary cat. When Oscar visits a patient and lays on their chest, their time is near. Oscar has the uncanny ability to predict death, possibly by sniffing out the changing chemical signature of an individual. It might seem dark and grim, but Oscar’s job is important, allowing the nursing home enough time to inform loved ones and give people a chance to say goodbye.
When people talk about those “fat cats” in government, sometimes they’re being literal. Cats have run for - and won - several positions in politics. Some notable examples include Stubbs (mayor of Alaska), Catmando (joint leader of Great Britain’s former Official Monster Raving Loony Party), and Limberbutt McCubbins (currently running in the 2016 presidential election as a Democratic candidate). Meanwhile, what’s your greatest achievement?
Chief Mouser of the UK Parliament
While the previously mentioned politician cats simply have to sit and watch over their domain, Larry has to earn his keep. As the Chief Mouser to the Cabinet Office, Larry spends his days hunting down vermin in the UK Parliament, and entertaining guests and cabinet members. It might seem like a gag, but the position is official, and has existed since the reign of King Henry VIII. Sadly, it seems that Larry was fired for underperforming, but don’t worry - this job comes with an excellent severance and retirement plan.
Police Officers and Security Guards
Lemon the cat is a true success story. Lemon grew up on the streets as a stray, but one day the Yoro police station in Kyoto, Japan picked him up and gave him a home and a purpose. Now Lemon is an honorary police officer in the station, raising the spirits of the police men and women in the station, and coming for ride-alongs to help calm victims of crimes.
Lemon is not the only hero cat assisting in keeping the peace and the law. Other cats have held security guard posts, sniffed out illegal sturgeon smugglers in Russia, and managed railway stations.
This proves it: cats make everything better.
- by Yuliya